This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
I'M HANGING OUT WITH THE DRUG DEALER UPSTAIRS JUST SO I CAN STEAL HIS WIFI PASSWORD, I HOPE Y'ALL LOVE ME.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I think I should write my liver a thank you note. If it had my work ethic, I would be dead now.
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