I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
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