S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
dude, she was giving me a lapdance and her thong had a skid mark. no I did not hit it.
I feel like today should be a " im going to have sex with you cause its raining and theres nothing else to do" kinda day
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
yeah, she started doing yoga and cocaine....looks good on her.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
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