Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Her vagina smelled like chicken
why do you say that
chicken smells like everything
i flashed his best friends last night
you always were good at making good first impressions
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I can make a sex schedule on Excel and send it to you guys
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
Oh shit. My bra is undone and I'm pretty sure I peed on my sandal
Randomize
