dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I'm going to have to start sleeping with my keys taped to my stomach.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
We all just did coke and we're coloring so if you're sober its pointless for you to come over here
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Should I be concerned you put your last name in my phone as "danger"?
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
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