So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
she's like "i'm so proud of u" ... and then i threw up on myself
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
you should have walked with me to my car. you just missed a girl rip off her bra and throw it into a dumpster and scream mardi gras
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
Randomize
