Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
We were all definitely blackout with drunk goggles on, even though you and Amanda were the only ones dressed up as it.
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Is it too early to start looking for freshmen penises to corrupt with our liquor and yoga pants?
I was just wondering the same thing! Gotta be any day now
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