who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
I'm so drunk I cant read cursive anymore.
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
How's work?
Spinning.
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
Well, i'm not hugging a bag of cheetos and crying while I watch Friends wishing that we were Ross and Rachel. So clearly I'might doing better than last night.
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
