Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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