I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
So I was just like hi, I'm your roommate's gf. Please don't hate me. That would be rly inconvenient for you.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Intoxication Level: I'm as graceful and flawless as a fucking dinosaur.
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Randomize
