i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
just had amazing sex with a girl I got caught with in second grade playing doctor. her examination is finallllly over
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I had to smuggle a street sign attached to a 14ft long pole out of my house this morning. The list of reasons for me not to drink just keeps getting longer.
Dude what the fuck...
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
Did you go to church in Texas and sign me up?
You need southern Jesus
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
I wasn’t trying to be creepy it just happened
I’m beginning to think that’s your defining personality trait.
Randomize