have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
yeah we're mixing orange juice, vodka, and rum and calling it Oj Simpson On Trial
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
the hot lifeguard just pulled a McDonald's cheeseburger out of her fanny pack.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize
