; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
There was no eligible dick at the ER. I'm pissed. Looks like "Searching for Strange at the Local Free Clinic" is a no go for the name of our first full length album. On the other hand, I got a dilaudid shot and I no longer feel like I have the worst bladder infection of my life.
Yes. Amanda is the only option and I want cake so I can sacrifice my vagina.
No shame December is a go.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
while he was teaching, every time he said "wet" he would look at me, that's what you get for sleeping with the professor's assistant
you said, 'he held out his hand, that means we don't have to pay' about the taxi driver, and then asked the doorman what happened to your pants...
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
I swear to fucking god if he takes away netflix I will have no problem sending his gf our sex videos
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
Randomize