hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Just saw a bouncer shoot a stripper with a squirt gun. He looked at me n said,"gotta keep em in check." I'm in love with this place
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
I opened my package from my mom today. She put four bottles of tequila in the bottom under my ducky slippers. She knows me way to well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
my poor anus
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
and then the sword just ended up between my legs
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Randomize