How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
if you can see her tanning goggle line that's officially a deal breaker
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
It's like a challenge who can be the biggest embarrassment to the family. I win 80% of the time.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Apparently my Ambien addled brain last night actually did decide to go ahead and photoshop you into various animal and human molesting scenarios. That's a hell of a thing to wake up to.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
I legitimately thought he died. I even called his mom at 3am and told her. Im done with vodka.
Guy from the bar last night left his number on my waterbill on the counter, at the bottom he put don't forget I can hook you up at Little Caesars I work their part time.
You sure know how to pick em.
Randomize
