i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Is puking blood really that bad of a sign? Can we pretend this is okay?
It's okay.
Hippo gnu deer
You sucked on the drag queens heel. It got that rough.
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Hey I know you're not home, but I'm here. Your front door is unlocked and someone took shit on your doormat...
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
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