How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
he thought i was passed out so he proceeded to jerk off while i lay on the floor next to him
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
What's the wine called that we really like and we usually drink it with xanax?
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
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