You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how come everytime i call mom shes doing tequila shots
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Out of ten? A seven. You pulled your shorts down to your ankles, jumped into the pool and announced you were a merman.
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
We're lying on the pavement outside of the college. No one has asked if we're okay. I think they all understand.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize