I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
how do we leave politely?
Tell them I'm going into labor. I will spill a beer and tell them m water broke.
His bond is $50,000..margarita Monday might get cancelled
Ihop lady gave me free pancakes for being sober this time
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
Do it break your family into faction start a civil war
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Randomize
