Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
im honestly more upset that i fucked a buckeyes fan than about cheating on my boyfriend...
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
The next time you try to involve a tickle me Elmo in my orgasm, I'm leaving you
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I was gonna buy a KIA, but then I remembered how awesome the sex was in the back of a Hyundai so I went with that.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
He looked so uninterested when the stripper was slapping him. Now his roommates are harassing me about how crazy our sex must be.
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
