It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
New requirements. My future husband must have a nose ring and wear headbands.
We are no longer friends.
That chode just called off the engagement. I just dropped his toothbrush in the toilet. And I’ve forgotten to take my birth control for the past two weeks. He’s fucked!
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
My hair is short now so it will be easier to give you alot more blow jobs
I'm going to take this text and frame it on my mantle
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
I feel like asking for a towel for after I puke before I puke to be more respectful than jus going outside to puke and coming back inside covered in sweat and tears.
He and I tag each other in memes all day. You could say it's getting pretty serious.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
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