just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
remember tomorrow: you burned the inside of your nose with incense. it hurt.
this chick on a show just showed her boobs and let some guy paint them others asked why she did it and her reply i quote "i was bored" why dont chicks get bored more often
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
I am day drunk. Get ready to see my dick.
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Don't be alarmed by all the Dick cakes in the fridge. But please don't eat..i accidentally broke one in half you guys can eat that one. Its labeled free Dick
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
My previously white toilet seat is now hot pink. I'm not sure why or how but I know it's your fault.
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
Randomize
