he was sobbing,drinking his beer, all while confessing his love for her. awkward was an understatement...
A horse told me not to drive home last night. I think there was a cop on top of it.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
afterward, he apologized, hugged me, and then gave me a granola bar and said “this is my apology gift.”
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
Put a Santa hat on my junk. He's wants to be festive too.
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
public service announcement: beginning at 10pm please text me at half hour intervals reminding me to keep my legs shut tonight. Note, this is not a drill.
Ya i'm marrying the man who can hear/smell this level of flatulence and stick around
Just confirming I will be washing my asshole at your house at approximately 2:45 tomorrow afternoon.
The strangest confirmation message ever sent.
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