i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she left out the fact that she had a kid until she told me not to suck on her tits too hard or milk would come out.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
THERE IS SOMEONE IN MY CAR MILKING HERSELF AND TELLING ME TO TRY IT
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But I aced my quizzes. Apparently flash card beer pong is an acceptable form of studying.
YOUR TO-DO SEX LIST CANNOT CONSIST ENTIRELY OF MY THREE BEST FRIENDS
and their significant others
AND THEIR SIGNIFICANT OTHERS
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Must lick fork, like it's a DICK
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