My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
tonight i'm making a christmas tree shaped shot pyramid
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
I have a fannypack full of condoms and acid. Let's get weird.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
This guy at the airport was telling me 3/4 dudes in his group got rufied at some strip club. One guy woke up in the hospital, another found himself in a random parking garage, the other got back to the room and they all shit their pants. Go Vegas.
Did you put candle wax on my balls last night?
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
On a scale from 1 to total dick, how inappropriate is it to pick your boyfriend up from rehab with a hangover?
Randomize
