Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
We need to rekindle our bromance
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I'm not trying to go crazy tonight either. I just want to go out, have a few drinks, meet up with my ex-boyfriend and get fingered or something.
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
You paid a stripper $40 to choke me out last night.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
I made him laugh his dick is mine
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
