a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I'm just waiting til he drunkenly pisses in his new man's car the way he always whipped it out and went Bellagio in mine.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
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