tell your sister to shave her snatch
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
On the bright side since it was a Tuesday you weren't even in jail for the long! that could've been worse!
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
I don't remember... but puking on the bar sounds like me.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
My house exploded and with it all my pot went up in smoke.
Randomize
