Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Got a 72 hour restraining order. Can we meet monday? Let me know!
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
he offered me cocaine within 5 minutes of my arrival. yes of course i'm keeping him
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
At least your vagina gets to vagina again. Dust that thing off.
First walk of shame in 18 years. Divorce is going well.
Randomize
