So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
we got cut off at 8 am. He spilled his drink three times on the plane. this should be one hell of a vegas trip
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
You used the best tools you had at your disposal.
Slutty, slutty tools.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
Day one of being single and I've came three times. I can get used to this.
Randomize
