there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I remember pointing out how smooth my legs were to try to direct his attention away from my vagina.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
In the 30 seconds it took me to leave the bar I let the barback motorboat me, ripped open a stranger's shirt and bit his chest, then made out with El Camino dude. No, I'm not coming out tonight.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Chaz got drunk and passed out so we superglued a kazoo to his mouth. Listening to him Panic when he woke up was fucking hilarious.
Randomize
