I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
