I'm convinced her vagina is similar to chernobyl, but I want to visit it for the novelty value anyway.
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
white shorts are a girls way of saying "im ready to fuck cuz its not my time of month"
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
Then you better bring Starbucks and a box of condoms in the morning.
Oh shit. This is getting real.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
did you just correct my grammar and then send me a photo of your dick?
Randomize
