he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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