brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
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