I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
it's not our fault the pink and the sink are so close together.
Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
The fact that its 10am on a gameday and I have yet to shotgun is absurd
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Also CANADIAN LIPS TASTE OF MAPLE SYRUP AND APOLOGIES. SORRY.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
I walked into the living room this morning and he was there with 3 shots in a row. He said it was "tea time."
was his pinky out?
It's your birthday, you should get to jizz where you want to. Jizz when you want tooo
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