What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I'm just a little drunk right now and I have to work at 3
Omg sara
I ran out of milk and it's hot and I was thirsty
Ive been thinking this might sound random.. But we need a piano in our house next year specifically for railing chicks on it.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
It's almost 5am and all I can keep thinking is IT'S WHISKEY TIME!!
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
