everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
I'm pretty sure that if I didn't have a gerbil with a shotgun in my uterus I would think i was knocked up cuz all I want is hot sauce
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I had a girl last night tell me that she was happy to find a condom wrapper in my garbage because,and I quote, "well at least you're not raw dogging every slore that crosses your path"
I'd feel bad about being drunk at the Christmas service, except for the fact that I've already had sex in this church, so this is just small change.
Was there a condom involved? Because he was saying he wanted a kid. Repeatedly.
I was told that I need a reference for my blow job skills. Be expecting a phone call tomorrow.
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
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