I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
She was drunk breaking up with me. All of my emails to her were coming back with UNSUBSCRIBE as the subject.
Also, they sell weed-chocolate covered strawberries. For the romantic stoner.
That was one of the best texts I got today
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
My roommate just woke up to me masturbating in our room. I figured this would happen eventually.
I’m really upset they canceled the conference. Since the divorce I’ve been working out, I bought cute new outfits and even found a bikini I liked. Now it’s all online. You can’t get laid at a webinar
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