hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
its not stalking. its research.
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
The cop left me alone after I gave her my spare snow cone. It was a hot and humid day and that uniform looked stuffy. Yay stoner me for overindulging in icy treats.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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