the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Can you please tell him to stop calling me ma'am? I'm starting to remember what it's like to have self respect
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Officially the best daughter ever. I just restocked my parents alcohol that I stole last night AND ADDED TO IT
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
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