i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Seriously. My exes act like they own shares of my vagina.
Well, in their defense, they have invested a lot of time and money
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Just lectured your brother about using condoms when hooking up with girls he meets online. I should be a fucking life coach
Hey can you send me a copy of my mugshot? I need it to prove a point
Randomize
