Your mouth is God's brothel.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
if I end up fighting someone to save $15 on a toaster oven then something went wrong earlier in life
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize