She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
upper decked the toilet at the restaurant that wouldn't let me pee there yesterday
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just remembered I gave $20 to a bum last nite. Philanthropy events always make me do stupid shit.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
I'm gone to the point of literally hugging trees, partially for support, but also because I like them.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
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