Every now and then I'll talk to a creeper for an extended amount of time. Randy, for instance, funded our entire night of horrible decisions.
I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
If you set your screensaver to be a slides show, make sure you remove dick pics first. This lesson 1 of living with your great aunt
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize
