oh my god I didn't know your sister was this good at french kissing
i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
last night some bitch put bruce along with his entire fishbowl in her purse and tried to leave. how drunk do you have to be to steal someone's pet??
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
Ok I won't set anything on fire if you wear pants all night. This is a bet we're both destined to lose.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
there's a liquor store near my therapist
i might give it a shot.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
Randomize
