He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
It's underwear night and I am literally in the bar wearing nothing but underwear and flip flops.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
In other news, someone I've had sex with won jeopardy last night.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
At least I remembered to wear a bra. I feel like that's a big accomplishment right now
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
You peed on a pole and declared to a cop that it was your pole and yelled at him to not even look at it, and then yelled at all of us for looking at it.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
Randomize
