...i apologize for hitting you up so much tonight im just kinda in a little pickle. im going to sleep in my car near u so pretty plz lmk if you head home...
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
i've never heard her scream louder than when the koreans scored. what am i lacking in bed?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
your goal of the night was to unlock your iPhone with your nipple. You're going places.
Dude, she puked up her Plan B, then reached in the toilet and re-swallowed it. That chick does NOT want a baby
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
We need to leave a grand offering for the god of free booze and salvia.
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
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