Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
I pissed myself at the bar so I threw away my wet underwear and kept partying... you act you've never done that before
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Go for it! You're young. Have fun. Be somebody's expensive hobby like Anastasia Steele.
I don't want to ruin date night, but you have no idea how hard it is to poop whilst looking at cute puppies.
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
Randomize
