there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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