thats it. im googling how to make you boobs smaller. this is getting out of control.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
Dude he was freaking out because he thought he was walking on crates, and he just kept saying help me
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I climbed out of the shower to him sitting on the floor trimming his pubes with nail clippers, we both just started laughing at how drunk we were
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
I always want to see you. Honestly my only hesitation is that my ass is still kind of sore from Sunday 🥺
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