I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
There is a distinct lack of front teeth here.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
I just found a tail you can wear naked. Via a butt plug. Who ever said the internet was a good thing?
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
Things you Cant unsee: When your smartphone syncs to your dads laptop and downloads photos...including his porn stash.
That awful moment when there is no more beer and you find yourself considering tequila and aloe juice.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I can't tell if I have the Pizza Hut shits or beer shits
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
I asked my boyfriend if he wanted a bong for his birthday but he instead asked for corndogs
the cheaper the better
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Randomize
