I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
she said it was ok for her to take her top off in the hot tub but she didn't take off her bottoms because that would be slutty
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Remember middle school health class where we used to say that when we lost our vcards we would be on the pill, using a condom, and have had our partners tested first? We were so optimistic.
I'm at about main and main street
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I just farted so loud someone came to check on me. Thought something fell in my office.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
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